Right - Christina, Melody, Amy, Misheal and Leanne
It was 1971, my husband came home one day after work and said, I sure would love to have another child. My quick answer was, no way!
It was 1971, my husband came home one day after work and said, I sure would love to have another child. My quick answer was, no way!
Our youngest was just turning six, and I had plans of my own. I wanted out of my seven year marriage. I'd entered into this marriage against my mother's wishes and without her blessing and worse in rebellion to the Lord. Still thinking I could run from a commitment I had made to him in 1968.
My husband lived a life apart from his family and did whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted. I lived in a hell of disappointment and constant fighting. To ask me to have another child only signaled to me he knew, I was getting ready to leave. Why was there no easy solution? I sought counsel from my pastor; after all he knew the hell I was living in. I was surprised and outraged, that he would counsel, I should submit to my husband’s request. How could anyone think that God would want me to bring another child into my present situation? Or stay in this hideous marriage. I wrestled with this for weeks and finally the spirit of the Lord would prevail.
My husband lived a life apart from his family and did whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted. I lived in a hell of disappointment and constant fighting. To ask me to have another child only signaled to me he knew, I was getting ready to leave. Why was there no easy solution? I sought counsel from my pastor; after all he knew the hell I was living in. I was surprised and outraged, that he would counsel, I should submit to my husband’s request. How could anyone think that God would want me to bring another child into my present situation? Or stay in this hideous marriage. I wrestled with this for weeks and finally the spirit of the Lord would prevail.
By the middle of that pregnancy the impossible happened, my husband, a prodigal would return to the Lord. By the end of 1972, my precious Misheal Marie had arrived and we were a Christian family...
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The Lord interrupted my thoughts with the words “I want you to have another child.” “What!” My heart jumped in fear at that thought. I already had three children and having another was the furthest thing from my mind. Six years after my husbands unexpected request, my heavenly Father was asking me to have another child. The next day I shared with my husband, what I believed the Lord had said, he was ecstatic. Less that joyful, I returned to a place of prayer and told the Lord I was his, and submitted my heart to his will. He told me that this child would be a girl, and to name her Amy, and then asked, what color do you want her eyes to be? Surprised, that I could ask such a thing, “I answered blue!” Up to that time my husbands blue eyes and my green ones had given us either green-eyed or brown eyed babies. By January, 1979 I was holding a little blue eyed girl.
At the time I was deeply involved with the teachings of Calvary Chapel. According Pastor Chuck Smith’s calculations we were running out of time, and 1988 was the last possible year before the appearance of the “Antichrist”. (No laughing now.)
I looked down at her, as only a new mother can do, and said in my heart, Father, how will there be enough time for you to use this little one? The Lord quickly, interjected into my thoughts, not only will I use Amy, but JOHN, also. “What!” So, WHO, is John?
By 1982, there would be two more little girls added to my overflowing world. With each “surprise” pregnancy I thought, so this is John. Instead it would be Melody and then Christina….. The Lord used Amy to open the door and sneak two more little ones into our family. How I would need these little ones and the joy they would bring my life in the years ahead.
By 2003 the rocking of my world from an unexpected divorce had started to take on a reasonable rhythm. The reality of child support/custody battles, financial ruin, lost community and friends, were somewhat behind me. The rebuilding of my life had started.
My children were adding to our extended family every year with either a new son-in-law, or a grand baby. The month of June would catch me by surprise. My tenth grand baby would enter the world with the birth cord around his neck, under his arm and wrapped again over his chest. It was a dangerous, stressful birth. I had been with my daughter and her husband for 2 sleepless days. During that time, Amy would be used of the Lord to administer CPR to this newest life. "Home again" at last, and rejoicing that all was well, I went to bed early.
I was in a deep sleep, when the phone rang. The voice on the other end said, Joian, this is John, it was Amy’s fiancée.(Yes, it seemed the John question had been answered!) He relayed that Amy was sick and had been throwing up for about 6 hours. I suggested a couple of remedies and asked him to call back, if there were anymore problems. I fell back to sleep and was awakened in about an hour. Amy was no better. I got myself up and drove the ½ mile to his mother’s house. It was around 11:00 pm. Amy was lying on the floor in the bathroom, the Lord said, get her to the hospital. Under protest we got her to the car and to the hospital. There would be no relief until 8:00 am the following morning. They discovered her appendix had burst, probably the day before.
Four days after surgery she was still vomiting. They were administering massive antibiotics, with injections every 4 hours to keep the vomiting somewhat under control and feeding her intravenously. John and I were taking turns staying with her. I had stopped visitors from coming as she was not improving, and asked family and friends to just pray.
When I was able, I would check the Internet to see what complications could arise from a burst appendix. With that information, I knew that she should be getting better unless some of the feared complications were beginning. The Lord instructed me to call no one, even to ask for prayer. I was holding everything inside and felt about to burst. The things I had been through the last 12 years had convinced me that repeating promises back to the Lord were useless, what had seemed to work in previous years left me with only one thought, if the Lord did not speak to me regarding this situation nothing I could conjure up would help. So I waited to hear his voice.....Sitting beside her bed I remembered he had asked me to have this little one. Surely her life was just beginning, I pondered the fact that he had brought John into her life?? Please speak Lord!!!!
As I sat there watching her try to sleep, I began to think the unthinkable. Would I lose her….had it come to this……..how would I ever survive such a loss………I felt helpless with the fear of it. I sat in the dark at her bedside for quite a while. Please Lord, speak to me. I can do nothing, not even believe or trust without you.
By 1982, there would be two more little girls added to my overflowing world. With each “surprise” pregnancy I thought, so this is John. Instead it would be Melody and then Christina….. The Lord used Amy to open the door and sneak two more little ones into our family. How I would need these little ones and the joy they would bring my life in the years ahead.
By 2003 the rocking of my world from an unexpected divorce had started to take on a reasonable rhythm. The reality of child support/custody battles, financial ruin, lost community and friends, were somewhat behind me. The rebuilding of my life had started.
My children were adding to our extended family every year with either a new son-in-law, or a grand baby. The month of June would catch me by surprise. My tenth grand baby would enter the world with the birth cord around his neck, under his arm and wrapped again over his chest. It was a dangerous, stressful birth. I had been with my daughter and her husband for 2 sleepless days. During that time, Amy would be used of the Lord to administer CPR to this newest life. "Home again" at last, and rejoicing that all was well, I went to bed early.
I was in a deep sleep, when the phone rang. The voice on the other end said, Joian, this is John, it was Amy’s fiancée.(Yes, it seemed the John question had been answered!) He relayed that Amy was sick and had been throwing up for about 6 hours. I suggested a couple of remedies and asked him to call back, if there were anymore problems. I fell back to sleep and was awakened in about an hour. Amy was no better. I got myself up and drove the ½ mile to his mother’s house. It was around 11:00 pm. Amy was lying on the floor in the bathroom, the Lord said, get her to the hospital. Under protest we got her to the car and to the hospital. There would be no relief until 8:00 am the following morning. They discovered her appendix had burst, probably the day before.
Four days after surgery she was still vomiting. They were administering massive antibiotics, with injections every 4 hours to keep the vomiting somewhat under control and feeding her intravenously. John and I were taking turns staying with her. I had stopped visitors from coming as she was not improving, and asked family and friends to just pray.
When I was able, I would check the Internet to see what complications could arise from a burst appendix. With that information, I knew that she should be getting better unless some of the feared complications were beginning. The Lord instructed me to call no one, even to ask for prayer. I was holding everything inside and felt about to burst. The things I had been through the last 12 years had convinced me that repeating promises back to the Lord were useless, what had seemed to work in previous years left me with only one thought, if the Lord did not speak to me regarding this situation nothing I could conjure up would help. So I waited to hear his voice.....Sitting beside her bed I remembered he had asked me to have this little one. Surely her life was just beginning, I pondered the fact that he had brought John into her life?? Please speak Lord!!!!
As I sat there watching her try to sleep, I began to think the unthinkable. Would I lose her….had it come to this……..how would I ever survive such a loss………I felt helpless with the fear of it. I sat in the dark at her bedside for quite a while. Please Lord, speak to me. I can do nothing, not even believe or trust without you.
We had been playing a Terry MacAllmon CD, softly in the room. His worship finally penetrated my mind, I silently, raised my hands in the dark, and began to worship. About 15 minutes into worship, I felt peace springing up from my heart and with my eyes still closed, I felt the Lord touch my shoulder, I saw him walk around the bed to Amy’s left side, and put his hand on her forehead. A few minutes later I opened my eyes and saw Amy with her hands raised, eyes closed, tears running down her cheeks. I said, “Honey, the Lord is here can you feel his presence?” Her answer still thrills my heart. Yes, mom she said, he has his hand on my forehead and I’m being healed. She opened her eyes and said, Mom, go home, I’m healed. I did, and she was. The next morning when I arrived at the hospital, she was up, still hooked to her IV post walking up and down the hallway.
The following day I took her home.
As we were about to enter the house she stopped, put her hand on the door and started to cry. "I asked are you okay honey," she answered, "I didn't think I'd every see this place again." And so we entered "home again", rejoicing.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Four years ago, as Jack and I drove over to the San Diego Bay area to have lunch, he turned and said, by the way, my given name is John, “Jack” is just what everyone in my family calls me.” I thought, now why did he need to tell me that? And there is that name again..........
Yes, he would use another one named JOHN, to turn my life back to himself. I have come to love the ways of the Lord………… Perhaps we will hear the use of that name again, somewhere in the future. Amy and John will someday bless our family with little ones. Maybe even a child of theirs will use that name. God is not limited to our timetables for fullfilling a word to us, and believe me he is full of surprises................ So Lord, here I am and JOHN ALSO.
Your ways are beyond our understanding and without limit. Another precious life from Tentmaker sent me this e-mail, it just brought tears to my eyes as it fit in with what the Lord was having me share today, it gives such hope for our future........IN HIM.
Your ways are beyond our understanding and without limit. Another precious life from Tentmaker sent me this e-mail, it just brought tears to my eyes as it fit in with what the Lord was having me share today, it gives such hope for our future........IN HIM.
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Joseph was imprisoned unjustly for seventeen years. He never ceased in seeking some way out. He told the cook and the cup bearer. He told anyone else that might get him out of there. But... nothing worked. He stayed there seventeen years. Then, one morning just like every other morning, they came and got him, bathed him, put a clean set of clothes on him and took him before Pharaoh. Before the sun set that evening he had been given Pharaoh's signet ring and was like unto Pharaoh in the land!
Our day will come. Suddenly, we will be released. There are many days that are "the day of the Lord" I believe. Oh, there is undoubtedly an ultimate day for this entire creation and for each individual. But, for now, there are these days "in part," I truly believe. He has already come to me in this area of my life ......setting me free experientially room by room in this humble mansion He is building inside of me! And, I am certain; He does the same to you!
So many visitations to us as He progressively continues His work in us. He will complete the task as He is faithful to do it. (Roy)
Love you all,
Joian
